Last Post Of The Year: Detroit and Belgium

2017 has almost come to an end. I’m not going to reflect on everything that happened, but rather the last two trips of the year. First up: Detroit!

I am thankful to Mistress Mara Mayhem for introducing Detroit as a travel destination in 2017. We made a very successful trip together in April. We immediately planned to return and November was decided as the next logical time to visit. I added Troy on as a side visit, with our final days being spent in downtown Detroit.

Troy SEEMED like such a great idea, but wasn’t. I wasn’t thrilled with my hotel suite, and let’s just say interest was lackluster for my visit. Ultimately, discretion was the biggest issue. It seemed like more clients were paranoid about “being seen” by someone they knew than anything else. While it was amazing to catch up with one of my long-time fans, it ultimately wasn’t worth it. Thus Troy, I won’t be returning. The male creatures there can just make their way to downtown Detroit and be happy that I’m visiting your state.

2017-11-09-18-00-30-e1514495941916.jpgDowntown Detroit was a different story. I simply adore this part of Detroit! How can one not love all of the new construction, renovations, restaurants, etc.? Mistress Mara Mayhem and I had an amazing hotel suite that was perfectly suited for our needs. I WILL chastise the local client population for its booking behavior, though. Male creatures who had contacted me in April, once again waited until the last minute to attempt to see me. I’m not sure what the issue is with planning and BDSM, but figure it the heck out! My erosguide ad is published TWO WEEKS before I arrive at any destination. There are also ample alerts on social media and my website. I had one fan drive up from Indiana to see me. He booked as soon as my trip was announced. THAT is how you do it folks! With that said, I ultimately had a great time with those who did plan and booked to see me.

I met up with my loyal client who takes me on outings in whichever city we meet. We started off the afternoon at a few locations around the downtown area. There were appetizers at Wright and Company and then a glass of wine at the Royce Wine Bar. Next up was a Detroit Pistons game at the new arena. I managed to snap an image of their cheerleaders in hot white boots. There is something about a pair of white boots that will always intrigue me. I have never owned a true pair of stiletto white boots though. It’s not like Satin Jim is going to be calling me up any time soon though…

I’m not going to discuss our dinner destination. It was less than stellar. I believe this was a matter of growing pains on behalf of the restaurant. It’s really not fair to lambast a location early in its existence. Hopefully we will get a chance to try them out again when they are more mature in their offerings.


The view from above San Francisco on my way to Belgium.

My last trip of the year was to Belgium. This is the bi-annual visit I have been making since 2008. This trip was more challenging than others in previous Decembers. Suddenly I had to deal with the consequences of winter weather! I expect rain in Belgium. I had never experienced snow there though. I think that many folks in various parts of the world had forgotten what cold winters were like. The past few years have been mild in the Eastern US and Europe. Not 2017! Luckily the first part of my visit in Central Antwerp was uneventful weather-wise. It was cold but I managed to keep my feet warm with the various foot rests who visited me during my stay.

I returned to my second location for the latter portion of my stay. I have been informed that clients in Belgium are not amenable to Mistresses who blog, so I will not mention her by name. This is unfortunate since I really wish I could laud her fantastic dungeon. Discretion is the better part of valor…

Despite the weather preventing some clients from making their way to see me, I managed to fill up my time in a most productive manner. Video clips, social media and my first show on made the cold days pass quickly. Luckily it only rained on my last day so I was able to have a marathon of sessions. I left the country exhausted but totally satisfied.

As for Christmas, it was outstanding as usual. It’s pretty difficult to have a lousy holiday season when I have slaves, fans, and admirers that are attentive and generous. I’m looking forward to 2018 and where my travels will take me next. As usual, check my website regularly for updated city and country dates. When in doubt, just drop me a line via email. I check it often and respond quickly.



London and NYC Recap

The Queen's Terminal.

The appropriate terminal for my arrival.

My October travels have come to a conclusion. It was certainly a memorable series of journeys!

I started off on October 5th to London. The purpose of this trip was to attend the Femdom Ball. I had been intrigued for some time with the concept of this event, and figured it was time to satisfy my curiosity. I had a bit of trepidation before setting out, as past experiences at London Heathrow Airport had not been efficient or pleasant during lay-overs (circa 2007). Thankfully, the process of getting to London went much more smoothly than I anticipated. Heathrow has changed significantly for the better. I was impressed with the entire process of making my way through the airport from landing, immigration, to baggage.

My faithful European travel slave, guy, was my attendant for the weekend. We have traveled to the Essen Fetish Weekend, and numerous video shoots in Belgium  in the past. He is an excellent traveling companion. I value his patience, resourcefulness, and above all humor in the face of transportation snafus. Let’s just say that our car service situation didn’t always goes as planned!

Femdom Ball Outfit

My Femdom Ball Ensemble.

The Femdom Ball itself was an interesting experience. I wore a latex top and skirt from House of Harlot. My female slave made the suggestion of choosing a color other than black. I thought that was an excellent idea and the results can be seen to the left. As for the event itself, I was fortunate to be seated next to Mistress Thick of New York. Let’s just say that we have like minds. I think our commentary kept the rest of the table entertained. One of the highlights of the evening was meeting Sardax. If you don’t know who Sardax is and you follow my blog, shame on you. Anyone who proclaims to be a follower of all things Femdom should know about his work. Sadly, one of the women at our table was completely clueless as to the man and his body of work. She was the winner of the real-time sketch with Sardax. Hopefully she has been adequately evangelized to his greatness and will become a future customer.

After the ball concluded, we made our way to Club Alice for the Rubber Cult party. Whereas the Femdom Ball was a formal event with many elaborate dresses and evening gowns, this event was simply about the rubber fetish. I saw every type of outfit imaginable! I think the latex cowboy ensemble was my favorite for originality and composition. Funnily enough, I ended up seeing some friends from the Texas Latex Party and Essen Fetish Weekend. It was nice to catch up with them.


The VQ Restaurant in London.

I didn’t session or sight-see during my time in London. I wanted to focus on the events on my schedule. There was plenty of socialization on Saturday and I used Sunday as a day to rest and catch up on social media and the like. We ventured out to the VQ Restaurant for dinner though. I simply HAD to visit this establishment. The VQ Restaurant is part of a chain that is open 24 hours–unlike my business! Ha!


I left London on Monday, October 9th and headed for my favorite city in the world: New York. I was obviously missed as the week was filled with sessions. When I wasn’t working at the New York Rubber Studio and bugging Mistress Ariana Chevalier, I was catching up with friends. Mistress Shane and I had dinner mid-week and Mistress Chloe joined us at the end. There simply wasn’t enough time to do doubles with either of them, but I’m hoping that this opportunity works out during a future visit. The best doubles manifest from real Femdom friendships. I also dined with @TheBootBitch during my visit. She is a Lifestyle Femdom friend.


The shoes modified for me by helix.

I don’t usually discuss sessions in detail that occur while I’m traveling, but this appointment was far more than “just” BDSM for pay. No, this was a life event. I say this as there are certain people in this world who have set themselves apart from the rest. The person in question goes by the handle of Helifix on social media. He not only enjoys being trampled, but he crafts BDSM toys as well. I think this is a bit of an understatement, as he has figured out a way to improve on a piece of equipment that I am notorious for using: the cockbox. He took the best parts of the cockbox–AND MADE IT PORTABLE! This device is also very visually appealing. Not only did he bring this portable cbt trampling board to the session, but he came bearing gifts. I am known for the modified high heels that Trampleguy has made for me. Helifix took it to the next level, yet again. He took a pair of “street legal” stilettos and made them into some serious “top fuel” contenders. I’m not exaggerating when I state that these shoes can’t be worn on the street. They simply can NEVER be on a floor. They can only be used on a soft surface such as flesh. Helifix and I had a great time using his cbt board and the new shoes. Like Trampleguy, he loves being recorded so I had a blast capturing video of the session. I am always fascinated to see what the ground level perspective of my trampling looks like. It just never gets old! I think it is apparent that I had a great time with helix. He is a very nice person as well as a great rug. My dream session would be where I trample him and Trampleguy at the same time.


A Manhattan in Manhattan.

My last working day in New York was spent on the outing I make every time I come into town. I meet up with a long-time client and we traipse around shopping and checking out new sights. The end of the evening was capped off by dining at the Carlyle Hotel. We first had a cocktail at Bemelman’s Bar. Then we moved to the restaurant. I thoroughly enjoyed the atmosphere of the location and the dress code: gentleman MUST wear a jacket. After experiencing fine dining in San Francisco, where there are too many patrons who don’t seem to care about their appearance, this was a pleasant change of pace. The cuisine and service were impeccable, as I expected. The bar has certainly been raised for out next excursion in Manhattan!

I was able to have a personal day at the end of my trip. I spent it with my best friend visiting a zoo and seeing a movie. I’m going to keep the details slim on that day as I really have done on a bit too long this time. It’s time to wrap things up and move onto planning for my next stop: Detroit!

“I want to be speshul!”

The title of this post was misspelled intentionally. It references a word that I use with friends of mine to indicate a type of need in certain individuals. It’s more than just the regular use of “special.” It’s almost infantile in it’s NEED to be the absolute center of attention and desire. Thus, the origin of my use of “speshul.”

I believe that I once thought I was speshul. In the early days of my Pro Domme career, I was naive beyond the pale. There wasn’t social media or even a vast band of veterans to counsel me on my silly thoughts. Only one other Mistress at the location where I worked knew how green I was. I never asked her for outright advice, but she gave it to me when she thought I needed it (thank goddess!). Despite her occasional words of wisdom, I had ideas in my head of how things were going to proceed in my career. When I saw a client for a few great sessions, it NEVER occurred to me that he would see another Pro. I mean, why? We had SUCH great sessions together, why look anywhere else? HA! I told you I was naive!! I chuckle at this sense of being speshul and unique. Of course I was totally hurt and devastated when I learned that, gasp, men have very little capacity for commitment. Yes, I’m making a blanket generalization here. There are few exceptions to the rule…but I digress.

Once I got over myself and figured that every client was just that: someone paying for a service who could see literally anyone under the sun, I was able to move forward with a clear head. Over the years, proclamations of undying fealty were made by those who “seemed” different, but you can guess that they were all mostly liars. Now I understand that they not only wanted ME to feel speshul, THEY wanted to feel speshul…

It’s a lovely idea to want to believe that the Pro Domme you are seeing puts you into a different category. That she wants to “own” you and make you “hers.” That is the epitome of being speshul. You want to be a possession. You want to be talked about and apart from the rest of the rabble you perceive that she doesn’t care about. You want to have a collar, you want to be marked, YOU WANT…Yes, it’s all about what YOU WANT.

I have two slave commandments, and a recently added third:

  1. How can I make my Mistress happy?
  2. How can I be the best slave that I can be?

The newest one is:

I am not allowed to say, “I want.”

The minute I hear this word, I need to re-educate the supplicant in front of me to change his verbiage. For those wanting to be speshul, you need to consider your use of it as well.

WHY should the Pro Domme seeing you make YOU feel speshul? I realize that you think that have done all of these things, and spent all of this money, etc. but, to quote my favorite WWE wrestler:


Now I’m sure that there are those reading this who will cite instances of “Mistress So-and-So’s” collared slave and HE is exclusive to her and HE is speshul. Yes, dear reader, these guys exist–but they are in the minority. I also don’t really count service under five years as being a true sign of devotion. Does anyone here remember the venerable slave james? The man who appeared in many of my videos? The one who everyone thought worshiped the ground I walked on? He made many proclamations. He wanted to be speshul. Annnndddd he didn’t last beyond five years.  It’s simply too easy to SAY a bunch of fluff, but it’s not easy for a man to really buckle down and Do The Right Thing for more than five years.

This is why, if you have been seeing a Pro Domme for less than a year, and you are already discussing how you WANT TO BE HERS, it’s just you wanting to be speshul. Think of her reaction as when a child comes to a parent and says, “I want to be an astronaut when I grow up.” The parent smiles, pats the child on the head, and simply says, “Of course you do dear.” The parent understands the realities and politics of becoming a fully-fledged member of an elite group of scientists. The parent understands that even though the child can end up getting a Ph.D in astorphysics and work at U.C. Berkeley in post-doctoral research, that he/she STILL might never become an astronaut (I briefly dated someone like this). Do they encourage the child? Yes, but they know that ultimately the goal will most-likely not be reached.

So your desire to be speshul is frankly looked upon as a naive understanding of the professional relationship that exists between you and the person you are paying for her time. No, Virginia, there isn’t a Santa Claus. The professional transaction is supposed to keep things honest. It doesn’t mean that we like or honestly care about you. We, as Pro Dommes, can be INTERESTED in you and your sessions while they are happening.

I’m sure there are those reading this who feel that is a pretty harsh statement. It’s not. It’s factual. YOU HAVE TO DO THE TIME FOR ME (or any of my co-horts) TO CARE. Whom do I care about?

mucous: in service since 1999

slave joe: in service since 2000

bill: in service off and on since 2001

This is my short list of locals and is not complete whatsoever so don’t get hurt if your name wasn’t mentioned.

I know there are Pro Dommes out there who are very good actresses. They talk a good game. They toss out collars like they are available from a vending machine. They know that their clients want to feel speshul and they play up on that. Good for them! I have a very small capacity for being untrue to myself.

In closing: I can make you feel unique and paid attention to during our time together. If we mesh via our interests, we will have a good time. You will only be “just another client/sub/insert your category here” though. That status can not change until time–and lots of it has passed. Not just time, but blood, sweat, and tears. Even then, I will be dubious about your expression of commitment. Once you understand this, then we can move forward.

The Ever-Snarky,